Grief is an exceptionally strong emotion and is frequently accompanied by feelings like anger, sadness, shock, guilt, and remorse. It’s a natural reaction to loss, whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a home, a relationship, or an unborn child.

Feeling Grief

At first, the intense emotional and physical pain of grief can be overwhelming and seemingly uncontrollable. People’s responses to loss are partially dependent on their relationship with the lost of loved their one or even sentimental object, as it will very to each individual experience, everyone is unique and reacts to grief in different ways, no one person is the same when it comes to handling grief.

Coping with Grief

As we are all different individuals, there is no one right way to grieve. Your experience of grief, including its length and intensity, will be unique.

To begin the process of working through grief, you must first acknowledge it. When asking people for assistance through this difficult time, you need to be assertive and articulate in expressing your needs.

If you are worried about your own mental state or that of a loved one, talking to a counsellor can help. If you have any questions please call Ruth Giles Counsellor on 0425 726 933.

Seeking helpful advice at the time you are experiencing relationship issues and wanting those hard to ask questions answered can be more problematic than expected. Or even looking for help from an outside source like a professional counsellor is a difficult choice to make, as we can feel quite scared of the unknown leaving us unsure of whom we can really turn to in our time of need, when all we want to do is save our marriage or relationship.

In this blog I'll cover what kind of relationship advice you should avoid at all costs.

I'll also give you some ideas about who you might want to turn to, and what to consider when you want to consult a professional for expert advice on relationships.

Good or bad relationship advice: family or friends?

First of all I'd really like you to try and tune into your own intuition.

You'll know deep down when you're ill-advised. You'll be questioning yourself and may sense that something's wrong... even if you can't immediately put your finger on it.

You might really want to go with the advice you've been given because it's what you want to hear. Yet you won't be able to help feeling a little 'niggle' that something about it isn't quite right.

Secondly, you'll need to consider if the advice you've been given is biased or unbiased advice on relationships. I'll explain more about this, but before I do - a word or two about who you should definitely not ask for advice...

Do yourself a favour; don't take any advice from someone (family or friends) if:

they like to gossip - no explanation necessary!their own relationships lunge from one disaster to another - also self-explanatorythey treat others - anyone - with contemptthey speak in a derogatory manner about othersthey like the sound of their own voicethey can't help but turn any conversation to their own troublesthey're too keen to voice their personal opinion

Be aware of biased advice on relationships

It's real a gift if you have friends and family members who are really supportive and keen to help.

However, the decisions you make and what happens to you will affect them too. Most of these wonderful people, therefore, are likely to offer you guidance and counsel that is biased (although they might not be conscious of this). That means that their suggestions, relationship tips or warnings are likely to be somewhat 'coloured' by self-interest.

So, when you seek relationship advice, by all means speak to friends and family - in fact I think it's a very good idea to share your troubles. However, just be aware that their direction and advice to you may not be completely impartial.

People who are not directly involved with you are more likely able to offer unbiased relationship advice. It has no bearing on them what you decide to do and they won't be affected - regardless of the outcome of your decisions.

So, where do you go for that kind of counselling?

If you are worried about your relationship or marriage, talking to a counsellor can help. If you have any questions please call Ruth Giles Counsellor on 0425 726 933.

We all feel down and sad from time to time – it’s a natural feeling. For some people these feelings of despair and emptiness do not subside; they persist for long periods of time and have a significant negative impact on their day-to-day life. In these types of cases depression counselling can really help you to see the light again and guide you to the doors of renewed hope and exciting opportunities.

If you are worried about your own mental state or that of a loved one, talking to a counsellor can help. If you have any questions please call Ruth Giles Counsellor on 0425 726 933.

Symptoms of depression:

Memory laspes or indecisivenessAn inability to control your emotions, tearfulnessGiving up hobbies or activities you once enjoyedDeep feelings of sorrow or emptinessFeeling guilty and worthlessNegative thoughtsIssues sleeping such as insomnia or hypersomniaLack of energy and fatigueLow or no libidoChanges in appetiteConsiderable weight loss or gainRepeated thoughts of death and suicide

Fortunately depression can be treated with the help of counselling and the support of great friends and family members. A qualified professional counsellor can help you treat this life crippling disorder and help guide you back on to the road of life and into the light of new and exciting adventures.

Often a crisis or life transition (birth of a child, loss of a loved one, empty nest, career change, retirement) provides momentum for taking a good look at a relationship that has grown ‘tired’ with the passing of time, or may highlight ongoing conflict that suddenly feels unbearable. It is then clear that old solutions are no longer effective in resolving current problems and issues. Working with your partner in couples counselling can be helpful when the strains of daily living and life transitions cause wear and tear on your relationship. This is especially so when communication problems mount, making it difficult to see one another’s perspective or to find ways of solving problems effectively together. Couples therapy provides a forum for learning new ways of communicating, and for clarifying each partners needs and how they may be more readily met.Common Questions about Couples CounsellingHow does couples counselling help with parenting issues? Couples counselling provides a safe forum where partners can talk openly about their concerns and differences, learn to appreciate the other’s perspective, and present a more united front with the kids.

If my partner and I are getting cold feet as we think about moving in together, does that mean our relationship is in trouble? Uncertainty is not uncommon as couples face various transitions in their relationship — including moving in together or planning to marry. Couples therapy, at these critical junctures, in the form of prenuptial counselling can make a huge difference in helping you to solidify your relationship and move ahead. If you are finding it difficult to communicate with your partner, talking to a counsellor can help. If you have any questions please call Ruth Giles Counsellor on 0425 726 933.